This past week in Lyon was idyllic. I’ve quickly discovered that I’m one of those mothers who wants to travel with their children. Yes, it can be hard and a little more exhausting, and I may have stressed myself out a little to self-induce a couple of massive zits pre-travel, but I LOVE knowing that they are experiencing the world with us. We wouldn’t have it any other way. This time the trip was made much easier by taking our live-in nanny, Joy, along. Yes, I’m now also THAT mama.
Back in Virginia we had a full-time nanny because it was much cheaper than having the Gents in daycare. Having Lesly also meant that I was able to see the boys because I worked from home. Even though she wasn’t live-in, she made our lives SO much easier. Plus she gave the boys so much love and nurturing. She was perfect for us.
When we found out we would be moving to Riyadh, and I would be working, it was a no-brain-er that we’d hire a nanny to help out. When I was interviewing Joy she asked if she could live with us. In Riyadh, the rates for household help and childcare are very reasonable and within our means. In fact, live-in help is even cheaper because we’re providing a place to live. This concept was completely new to us, but it didn’t bother us either. We have the space so why not? And someone on hand all day to help out? I can easily subscribe to that. This isn’t 24/7 childcare though. We do give her the weekends off. I love our children, but I also recognize that everyone needs a little break! At any rate, a live-in nanny was never an option for us in The States.
Quickly I became accustomed to this new way of life. J and I were both able to workout again, we could go on dates, explore Riyadh, attend social outings at the Embassy and even stay out a little late with friends. Admittedly, Lesly was awesome in Virginia and often watched C&R in the evenings (for free!) so we could go out, but this is now a whole new world that we hadn’t experienced as parents before.
Soon after our arrival we started thinking about our first trip. When we decided on Lyon J asked, “Do you think Joy will want to come?” It hadn’t occurred to me. Traveling with a nanny? I know people do that, but not us! We've handled these guys on our own before. Plus she probably wants a little vacation, too. I would totally understand if she didn’t want an all-expenses paid trip to France, and get paid for doing her job…as much as that sounds ludicrous. Sometimes I don’t feel like traveling for work either. Fortunately, she agreed to come with us. I immediately started planning for our Michelin starred dinners, knowing we’d have someone at home with the boys in the evenings.
Vacations are supposed to decrease stress, but anyone who has traveled with a small child can tell you that another vacation is immediately needed upon arrival back home. It is more work than usual. The travel itself, baby proofing an Airbnb or hotel room, or not really being able to baby proof so you’re constantly helicopter parenting for fear they’re going to break something, meals, baths, sleeping arrangements, proper playtime, etc. We certainly managed all of this on our own before, but now that I’ve experienced a vacation with Joy I don’t want to have another without her. Even just for the flights alone it was so nice have an extra sets of hands while J got the carseats on and off the plane or got the carseats secured before getting the Gents settled. At our Airbnb she’d be up with me (they slept in my and J’s room so I got up with them), helping to feed the boys and get them ready for the day while I got myself ready or J ran out for our coffee. There was a park nearby so she’d take them over when they needed to blow off some steam. Don’t worry, we’re not monsters. We we did give Joy a day off to explore and took C&R with us when we drove down to Chateauneuf-du-Pape.
Maybe it’s the fact that I’m not jetlagged or that each trip with these guys gets a little easier as they become a little older and more experienced travelers or getting to spend time with a dear friend energized me, but I’ve never come back from a trip feeling so good. Not only did we get to visit a beautiful place to experience amazing food and wine, but we got to spend quality time with each other as a family AND we had our adult evenings out.
Anyone who knows me well also knows I did not grow up privileged. When I was a toddler my grandparents watched me and when my siblings were old enough they became my babysitters. I never met anyone who grew-up with a nanny until in my twenties when I met people from New York’s upper east side. I know this is going to come off sounding really pretentious, but having a live-in nanny is the best decision we’ve made. Joy is really good with the Gents and they enjoy her. She makes it possible for me and J to take care of ourselves, physically and mentally, as well as spend quality time with each other. I’m probably in a much better mood because of her, too. It’s crazy to think that we had to move to the other side of the world for this to happen. I have joked with other Embassy wives about not getting too accustomed to the perks of this life. For now, I’m taking advantage and enjoying it. Riyadh made this possible and for that I’m incredibly thankful.